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“I tried that,” he replies, “but then I couldn’t breathe.”An Italian tourist asks a blonde man: “Why do scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats?” To which the blonde man replies: “If they fell forward, they’d still be in the boat.”A friend told the blonde man: “Christmas is on a Friday this year.” The blonde man then said, “Let’s hope it’s not the 13th.”Two blonde men find three grenades, and they decide to take them to a police station. One asked: “What if one explodes before we get. Im a photographer as well and the angles and poor lighting always made me grimac and loose your number. Anyways, getting back to my fantasy. I was only ever able to use my large dong once before he threw it out. (I wonder how many large dongs are in our landfills). That was enough for me. I love this man but men can be so stupid. You really think that you can be replaced by toys?! All you are worth to me a lump of silicone? This closeminded attitude made me want to shock him. We are. If she wished I shud accompany her for a weekend once a month to any place outside Kolhapur, where it wud be just Eat, Fuck, Sleep and Repeat. After all these conditions, terms I agreed so that I cud bang her asap. She asked me about my conditions. I had only 2, Condoms every time and she shouldnt ask whom I fuck in the other room. She said Rekha shivay tu ani konala ananaar ithe???? (except Rekha whom are you gonna bring here?) Now to describe the room. It had a big double bed with heart. She explained that she had been lonely since her husband had past away three years prior.I comforted her placing my arms around her, pulling her close for a sensual kiss and telling her that I understood.I began to rub her shoulders and told her to lie on her stomach on the bed where I could perform a more complete massage,beginning first with her feet then calves and when I got to her thighs,I moved my hands further up and began to massage her buttocks in slow circular motions to the lower.
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